October, I learn by heart.

I'm quite happy that I finally have some time to open my laptop, or i can say to touch it.. 

and have a bit fun here.

This month is running far from what I have planned before, I've been wanting to give my design work more serious of a try a while now. But i wasn't really able to because I did accept the schedule for shooting and doing some other's try.

But ever since I began shooting full time, that’s how I learn. I've been pushed on my ability to control my emotion, hike up my agility, and especially, I got an exclusive lesson, "the art of communication". 

I've always work with my laptop, which i put on a cup of tea beside it. New age songs are an anathema for me. My working life was spent in silence design room which i really need to start my brain explore the idea. I'm busy with my own work, i talk only with the client, my work partner, or easier to say, 

I'm used to have hardly any a talk.

The latest time, as my deadline looms, I usually lock myself away in my flat, i don't answer the phone nor reply all messages.

But now the only time i can get that silence and is when i sleep.. the rest of the time i have the conversation on constantantly and full with flexibility.

Last august, I was faintly distracted. Getting my design works done is a rush, I couldn't get my head be focus in 2 contrast kind of work (this is the problem of someone who have an average brain like me) It was tiring, really.. I was like an elephant returning to die, I come back to my flat after done the entertainment stuffs to finish whatever design I haven't been done and finished them in a bad result.

and I've lost my big chance in September. I was perfectly, messed up.

that's why i was like always saying.. "wake me up when september ends.."

I started to think this out, what is the innermost longing, on my mind.

This has been a huge transition for me.

somehow all we need is simply requires giving up everything we thought about what that means..

God is writing my story, and make a twist in some parts..

some chances are given

for real, Acquire a greater understanding of the world through particular unpleasant stressful experience.. 

and one lesson, learned :)