Matter of Fact

I didn't really understand my feelings
I've been always like this

I always think about other first than think about myself, or 
if i really didn't want to, i could only follow for other's sake and let the bad things happen to me. 

Why couldn't I say it clearly that I want to or I won't

People is always the same..
talking bad things behind your back, without think back of what we've ever done, or even more.. 
they will always judge the way you live as if they had a perfect flawless life.. 

So it would be fair enough if I say my true feeling honestly
Everybody has right to do that isn't it.